The One On Exercise

30 Mar

Just typing that title out made me feel a bit tired. Whew!

From as far back as I can remember (and I don’t need to try too hard with this one), it has been more than evident that physical exercise wasn’t big on either my interests or my attention. Neither did I care too much about it and neither did I (naturally) fare too well at it either. It was always looked upon as more of a task, a chore, a must-do thanks to school priorities and less as something fun or interesting. Even those evening neighbourhood games weren’t alluring enough… Right from the horrendous PT teacher we had at the first school we studied at (she was this stern, almost gruesome Mallu lady who took no time and all the pleasure to whip us with her ever yielding black whip which had the whistle of doom as I’d like to remember it, attached to the other end) to the many activities that were enforced upon us – it was all too overwhelming and all too shaming for me… sucking at something, failing at something which was apparently so much fun and so simple, didn’t make it easy to face my peers…after all, who disliked play time anyway?

Even the many times we played catch-catch, chain-chain, hopping and catching, hide and seek, dark room, among many other games, I was always the child who either never played or was made the denner too often (and still never managed to catch people in time before they slammed one two many dabbas on the target wall) or who, whenever she finally got the chance to hide or run or basically not be the denner, always wanted to pee. This urgency to pee especially after hiding snugly in a spot during rounds of hide and seek or dark room happened on cue, every.single.time. I hated it. Apart from the fact that I’ve loved books since the very start, it was no wonder that I found my solace in reading, writing, drawing – basically being your typical nerdy kid who was good only with books…a typical bore to an otherwise normal kid who loved to play and lived for game time.

When my brother and I shifted schools to one where the rules, while seemingly more relaxed, were binding in their own ways…we had an array of activities to choose from. So I always picked yoga over taikwondo and reading over game-time, till I was snuffed out my hiding place in the library and made to play – game time was mandatory – play what you like, but play you must, was the mantra…the rule we couldn’t bend. (No sane kid wanted to bend that rule, either).

As Murphy would also like to have it, I am blessed with those set of genes that welcomes doses of adipose without much thought or effort. Therefore it isn’t with great trouble that I put on weight or feel bulky or flabby, even. My generous friends from my grown up years even have a name coined for me on the basis of this flab factor. To add to this equation, I love food too much to care about a diet, really. So it adds up pretty well, in Murphy’s favour, so to speak. Doesn’t care much about physical exercise, gifted with the adipose gene and food lover – a thrilling combination for someone who loves a great fitting pair of jeans, not.

Over the years, when it started becoming evident that it was getting progressively easier to gain weight and drastically harder to lose it, did the idea of exercise and a balanced diet make itself felt. I’ve been trying to gym ever since and at least try to think about being more strict with my food intake. I’m far from being or looking like a gym rat and neither do I pass that plateau of weight loss – basically I look the same – sometimes I feel more flabby and sometimes I feel pretty okay. It’s the underlying fact that denying myself certain foods is a no-go, which doesn’t help my case – I love food too much.

Besides, the concept of body image is a very dear one to me. It is something that started all those many years ago of not liking exercise and loving food too much which made my body the way it is today. I am not fat, neither am I skinny – I think I am my own – curvy where I am supposed to be, plump where I should be, and fine in general. Of course there are certain areas of my body I wish I could sculpt better but I’m not complaining really. Growing up in an environment where food was not equated with beauty really helped me, even today. The importance of loving ourselves, the way we are, is an immense challenge – one we are witness to at so many levels. We are the khaate peete log who love their food but are watchful of the things we eat. There exists no exclusion of things we must not eat…but there exists a sense of control on how much we eat. Of course that factor gets overridden when our favourite things are at the table and you snarf down one too many without even realizing it. But that’s life, right? To let go and live in the moment, sometimes at least?

Here I am, very aware of my ever-changing body, trying to not be an indulgent ass who only eats and doesn’t move, with a body far different from what is perceived to be sexy but feeling so very real in this moment. I’ve never had so many beers or so many carbs or snacked on so much junk food in what feels like forever. But sitting down for that quality time with the ones I love, more often than not, revolves around something to eat and drink…a habit that has formed over the years, and one that can change/evolve into something more healthy in nature. I have learned that I cannot cut out certain foods from my life no matter how hard I try because in all honesty, I never really tried hard enough to keep them at bay in the first place. I would much rather grant myself the pleasure of having that piece of chocolate or that extra bowl of mishti doi than not have it at all and feel miserable about it. If you are a food lover, you’ll automatically know what I mean. I guess it is better to make peace with who we are, work towards becoming healthier versions of ourselves and living the life we want to lead, right?

Of course I say this after having consumed some chips and not having moved my butt at all today. Maybe tomorrow will hold a salad and a walk for me…or so is the hope.

I guess what I’m trying to say (perhaps to make myself feel better) is that I don’t really love exercise or fall into any sort of category when it comes to exercising activities, that I understand the importance of making physical activity a habit and not just a passing desire, that food is an almost all-encompassing factor in my life (ice creams and wine fit this bracket too, right?), that my body shape and size is normal and is going to be as sexy as I believe it to be (thanks for the self-confidence and self-diagnosis, Babska!) and that living in the moment is a great thing we should all strive towards…

…like this sublime thing I just succumbed to, for lunch, as I wrote this post.

IMG_1771

Psst…there really is nothing more glorious than a masala omelette. Nothing.

Learning: Live in the moment; whether it requires you to grab a doughnut or those dumbbells, or both.

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6 Responses to “The One On Exercise”

  1. kylewashere90 March 30, 2016 at 3:32 PM #

    Hey, good morning! Enjoyed the read, am looking to get into good shape myself, by working out, eating good and stopping alcohol! Two weeks in, any tips? 😊

    • Babushka March 31, 2016 at 10:15 AM #

      Hey Kyle! From what I see, it looks like you could give me tips on healthier living. Two weeks in is some great motivation you’ve got going!👍🏼

      • kylewashere90 April 1, 2016 at 12:44 AM #

        Thank you! Feeling good at the moment, you into your fitness?

        • Babushka April 1, 2016 at 4:52 PM #

          Yep, I try. :)

        • kylewashere90 April 1, 2016 at 8:42 PM #

          Quality. Enjoy your weekend :)

        • kylewashere90 April 1, 2016 at 8:47 PM #

          Also, connect with me on instagram, vintageeuropebikes :)

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