Good Morning

12 Jan

It’s a good morning, in every sense of the word. I haven’t had my usual routine this morning, which I do quite enjoy and which I look forward to. So no, it hasn’t been a morning that has begun in the usual happy routinely manner that I like my mornings to begin with…but it’s a good morning, in every sense of the word.

It’s a good morning because I’m here, to begin with. I’m making no promises to write or to be active in the real sense of the word. I’m choosing to make this a relationship of convenience because that automatically gives me the ease of escape, of convenience minus expectations, so to speak. But I’m here. And that makes me feel good.

It’s also a good morning because while I still haven’t gotten entirely used to substituting the 4 with a 5 when I write 201_, it’s a good place to be at and a good time to be in, or so is the hope. While it is technically a shift into just another new day, I like to look at it at more than just that, as so many of you would. Perhaps it’s symbolic of newness and opportunities and new chances, all over again. Who doesn’t like more chances, right? So I’m holding on to that for now; to this new morning we’re blessed to see and make ours. And that makes it all good, all over again. And I’m not complaining.

Throughout the past year, I’ve seen a shift in my perspective towards blogging that I thought was otherwise almost concrete since the time I first started, and continued to do so. I’m not sure if it is a phase of wanting to be away from the public eye or whether it was the inability to put my thoughts together in a coherent stream of more sense than non sense. There were, as always, and I assure you, so many thoughts that I needed to streamline but there came a point when I stopped trying. Letting go is almost as easy as being able to actually let go. And when you’ve got a barrage of thoughts followed by a barrage of after-thoughts and a further barrage of over-thoughts (from the overthinking of everything), it somewhere becomes imperative (and I choose to use this exact word) to let go. And so I did.

And for (I think) okay reason. When you blog and when you blog the way you do and about what you do, boundaries become necessary. Or so I believe. And somewhere down the line, I realize I was unable to draw those lines that made it easy for me to come here and just…write; with feeling, with experience, with emotion and with my thoughts. It happens, and I assure myself that this is normal; that it is okay to take a step back and assess where you’re really standing. It’s okay.

But I’m here today. Minus promises. Or expectations. And larger than life hopes (which aren’t that large after all).

And that makes it a good morning, in every sense of the word.

Happy New Year, you. :)

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